Hello Friends, and welcome to another behind the scenes video post!
I was actually struggling to make this video, mostly from a creative perspective. I mean, how interesting is watching a mechanic swap out parts? Initially there were to be two videos, one about bus problems and the other as a “week in the life wow have I ever had some epiphanies as of late”. The latter of which was sure to be just as boring. LOL! Obviously I really need to start focusing a little better and shun my ADHD Monster. 🙂
But combine them I did, and here you get to understand a little of what I was actually trying to say. LOL!
When I separated from Nikki for a couple of months, I had a lot of time to contemplate things. It started out with all the things she did wrong. Then turned inwards towards what I had done wrong. But eventually it distilled itself into who I wanted to be. I decided that I needed to start within, because there was no other way to offer the gift of me to both Nikki and to myself unless I first understood who I was.
The long and short of it was that for the most part, I wasn’t all that bad. LOL!
But I was/am also quick to frustration. I tend to react quickly to small triggers. And that’s something that I have been actively working on … and actually succeeding in fixing. My philosophy has been to ask myself if whatever is in front of me will still be triggering me in an hour. If not, just let it go. Not bury it, just brush it away and focus on better things. (Burying shit is also a nemesis). If the trigger might still be alive and kicking in that hour, address it with communication or action. Not rudely or with anger, but directly with the intention of eliminating/managing it. But … that takes patience and tolerance.
That’s why I started my “Rules” that you just watched with patience. I noticed that when I took a breath and stepped back for just a second, I was able to return to whatever was in front of me with a tad more patience. I was less emotional and a little more logical. Pissed off still, sure. But enacting revenge wasn’t my first reaction anymore.
This has been a work in progress, but honestly … I am happier now that I’m making real self-improvement “a thing”.
The rest of the rules also had a YouTube theme to them. Finding your heroes and emulating them. Breaking the rules by first following them. Accepting imperfection. I had also been thinking a lot about my quest to be a successful YouTuber. My failing quest, that is. And while I was working through that quagmire, I kinda realized that everything I was doing in that arena was just an extension of my life in general.
And so, I decided to fix both the bus and myself. It’s actually a lot more complicated than that, but I only had 16 minutes and 42 seconds of video to work in. LOL! The bottom line (for me, and hopefully to inspire you) is that I realized that overcomplicating everything leads nowhere. By having more patience, focusing on what’s important, emulating people who have happy and successful lives, and learning which rules to keep and which ones to bend are all that is needed to get to where I want to be. That my outward extension of myself (YouTube) really isn’t all that different from my inward side.
Anyway, that’s why I created this video. When the bus is back to 100%, I want to be close to completely fixed as well. Because so many more adventures are about to start, and we both have to be ready.
~ Rick