This … is 8 inches long. I know because I measured it myself using a highly scientific device of a known length.

Men do not use tape measures. Not the ones that when you push the button either recoil and snap back at you like an evil ex wife, nor the ones that get stuck halfway out and require shaking and excessive cussing until you throw it away in disgust. None of those “as seen on tv” devices can come close to measuring as correctly as a man’s body. Take a knuckle on a man’s finger. It is exactly one inch. Just the same way a 2×4 is exactly 2 by 4 inches.Want to measure the ground? Walk it off! And not some heel to toe BS walk. Just walk like a man. Our strides are between 2 and 4 feet, so the average is 3 which means that each one equals one yard. Or one meter if you’re outside the US. That’s how you measure distance.
And speed? Speed is easy to measure. It’s never enough.Counting, say … beers? Everything is two beers. Always. No matter who’s asking. This is a man law.Gentlemen … and ladies … it’s truth that men are simply equipped with the tools necessary to measure anything. Now there are those with lathes and micrometers who may disagree, but in everyday life and in home construction these are all the tools you’ll ever need. (Excerpted from THE 10 LAWS OF MAN LOGIC … coming soon)