EMSUM is a satirical organization devoted to curiosity, questionable decisions, and the pursuit of better stories. Nothing on this website should be considered medical, legal, financial, mechanical, spiritual, marital, navigational, or digestive advice. If you choose to move overseas, ignore sensible people, or take the long way home, that's entirely on you. Please consult a qualified professional—or at least someone more responsible than us—before making major life decisions.